[fullwidth background_color=”” background_image=”” background_parallax=”none” enable_mobile=”no” parallax_speed=”0.3″ background_repeat=”no-repeat” background_position=”left top” video_url=”” video_aspect_ratio=”16:9″ video_webm=”” video_mp4=”” video_ogv=”” video_preview_image=”” overlay_color=”” overlay_opacity=”0.5″ video_mute=”yes” video_loop=”yes” fade=”no” border_size=”0px” border_color=”” border_style=”” padding_top=”20″ padding_bottom=”20″ padding_left=”0″ padding_right=”0″ hundred_percent=”no” equal_height_columns=”no” hide_on_mobile=”no” menu_anchor=”” class=”” id=””][imageframe lightbox=”yes” lightbox_image=”” style_type=”none” hover_type=”none” bordercolor=”” bordersize=”0px” borderradius=”0″ stylecolor=”” align=”center” link=”” linktarget=”_blank” animation_type=”0″ animation_direction=”down” animation_speed=”0.1″ hide_on_mobile=”no” class=”” id=””] [/imageframe][fusion_text]One of the most difficult aspects of working as a family law attorney is seeing the impact that turmoil in a household can have on the children involved. In some scenarios, divorce is ultimately the best resolution to marital turmoil. It is important to remember that it is difficult for a child to be happy if their parents are not. However, most children struggle in the face of their parents’ divorce. Consider the following written by psychologist Carl E Pickhardt Ph.D. for Psychology Today:
“Divorce introduces a massive change into the life of a boy or girl no matter what the age. Witnessing loss of love between parents, having parents break their marriage commitment, adjusting to going back and forth between two different households, and the daily absence of one parent while living with the other, all create a challenging new family circumstance in which to live. In the personal history of the boy or girl, parental divorce is a watershed event. Life that follows is significantly changed from how life was before.
For the young child, divorce shakes trust in dependency on parents who now behave in an extremely undependable way. They surgically divide the family unit into two different households between which the child must learn to transit back and forth, for a while creating unfamiliarity, instability, and insecurity, never being able to be with one parent without having to be apart from the other.”
If you have children and are currently seeking to end your marriage, the best piece of advice I can give is to schedule your children time to speak with a licensed professional. Even if you do not see signs that your children have been impacted, therapists and psychiatrists specializing in children will pick up on subtle signs that your children may be struggling and can provide them with the tools necessary to navigate the stressful experience.
In addition, it is important that you keep the lines of communication open with your children. There are numerous resources that you can utilize at home to broach the subject of divorce and address fears that your child may have about their changing life. A list of children’s book that discuss the topic of divorce can be found below.
For more information, don’t hesitate to contact me today to schedule a free consultation.
- ‘Two Homes’ by Claire Masurel
- ‘Dinosaurs Divorce’ by Laurene Krasny Brown and Marc Brown
- ‘Was it the Chocolate Pudding?’ by Sandra Levins and Bryan Langdo
- ‘The Invisible String’ by Patrice Karst
- ‘It’s Not Your Fault, Koko Bear’ by Vicki Lansky
- ‘The Divorce Helpbook for Kids’ by Cynthia MacGregor
- ‘Fred Stays with Me’ by Nancy Coffelt
- ‘Horse Dreams’ by Mary Vivian Johnson
- ‘Divorce is the Worst’ by Anastasia Higginbotham
- ‘It’s Not the End of the World’ by Judy Blume