Effective Co Parenting in Arizona
Co-parenting is one of the best arrangements for your child in the aftermath of a divorce. Many newly divorced parents, however, will struggle because a massive adjustment is required to make co-parenting successful.
You have to understand the fact that you’re free to move forward as an individual but you’re also a parent. Effective communication with your ex-spouse is of paramount importance in order to make co-parenting happen. Here are a few additional tips that will ensure a smooth transition to the new parenting situation.
Communicate Clearly and Effectively
Chances are that you’re currently mad at your former spouse and you don’t want to talk to them. Still, you’ll have to be in touch to coordinate parenting effort.
Remain in constant communication and choose the method of interaction that both of you feel comfortable with. Keep it respectful and business-like. A short phone call, an email or a text will be sufficient to address important issues and reach an agreement that’s in the best interest of kids.
The most important thing to remember is that you should never use children as messengers or keep information away from your former spouse out of spite.
A simple rule of thumb to follow when it comes to communicating is that you should always provide the type of information that you’d expect to receive from your ex.
Maintain a Degree of Flexibility
Even when your Arizona divorce attorney works really hard to get the best outcome for you and your kids, it’s possible for the court to finalize an arrangement you’re not particularly happy with.
In such instances, you’ll have to maintain a degree of flexibility.
Schedules will conflict, arrangements will change all of the sudden or you’ll have to arrange a weekday visitation that you’re not particularly keen on. Co-parenting means working with each other to a degree and having a plan B.
Your former spouse could have a work situation that keeps them from getting with the kids. As the custodial parent, you may want to consider another day for the children to spend time with their mom or dad. Working out such an arrangement is going to be to the benefit of everyone, even if you don’t feel this way in the beginning.
Work Together on the Ground Rules
A united front is imperative, even after your Arizona divorce gets finalized.
You will need to get together with your ex-spouse and work on the ground rules that will have to be followed in both households.
A transition from one house to the other should be seamless for the children. If parents have different expectations and different parenting methods, confusion and chaos will ensue.
Discuss television and computer use, homework and exercise schedules, nutrition plans, discipline and permissible parenting methods. In co-parenting situations, it’s common for one person to become the good cop and the other to be the “cool” parent. Both of you have limited amount with the children but this doesn’t mean you should spoil them or give into their every demand.
Click here for information on planning for parenting time in Arizona.
Keep Divorce-Related Issues Away from the Kids
If you didn’t end the marriage on amicable terms, there will be some resentment. Confrontations could occur but it’s important for such negative encounters to take place when the kids are away.
Discuss divorce-related issues with your attorney or call your spouse when you know that the children wouldn’t be listening in.
Be cool around the children and don’t badmouth your ex-spouse. Young minds are very impressionable and using children as hostages in the aftermath of a divorce could scar them for life.
Finally, enlist some professional assistance if you don’t think you’re doing a good job. A family law attorney can shed some light on your rights and obligations. A therapist can help you deal with the negative emotions. It’s normal to struggle but coping tools do exist and should be employed to make the transition smoother and faster.
Click here to find out about hiding assets in a divorce in Arizona.